Opening the Door | Kim Vanderheiden

Opening the Door is an extension of my work on Justice. If we wish to live in a more just, loving and peaceful world, we must look within ourselves with the same justice.

You must open the door to your own self and unpack – unpack everything painful or shameful in which you were victim, perpetrator, or both. Unpack everything beautiful, and sacred that was always too much to hold. Look carefully at each piece that comes from within. Love it if you can, but if you can’t yet, at least get past hating it. Fear it if you must but at least look at it and recognize that you are afraid. Try, though you often fail, try every day to be daring enough to go about your business while holding your insides in your hands. Don’t stuff them back behind the doors. When you can, set your pieces down and walk away, yes even the sacred things. What flows through the empty space within you that is left behind will be far more sacred. When your hands are empty of these, you can use them for your truest work. Each piece you’ve walked away from will bring all of us closer to justice, and the real work your hands begin will bring us closer still.

Choreographed by Karen Dito and Krista Samboy in collaboration with the dancers
Performed by Krista Samboy, Monica Dominguez, Viviana Hernandez, Nicole Schwing, Katy Kirkland, and Emma Koslosky

I was spellbound when I saw iphone photos of the early stages of Kim Vanderheiden’s woodcut collages featuring figures with their insides spilling out. As a choreographer, I imagined movements connecting to those pieces.

I gathered a group of seven women from age 15 to 55 to join me. Some were new to dance, some have danced for over 40 years. The Dance Live Dream Center donated rehearsal space. Kim gave us a copy-shop-printed booklet of all of the pieces in her series, “Opening the Door,” and we got to work.

There have been many deeply moving sessions among the dancers as we’ve felt our way through what spilled symbols mean to each of us: stuffing feelings and then letting them go, supporting one another, casting out our demons, and accepting the changes in life with struggle and grace. It’s already been a transformative experience.

Our next steps are making video documentation of the dance, creating costumes, and booking performance space, and arranging exhibitions, so we may invite the public to participate in this moving experience. This work is intense, painful, heartfelt, warm … a truly awesome experience.

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